The fitting from a males perspective

So we decided to spit in the face of tradition and smash a few mirrors in the process (later in the day we had a black cat cross our path a few times but that was our friends little kitty 'piccalo').

This Saturday was my last fitting and the second for my tall flower girl and rather than take two cars as we had to head further south to drop off our rings (I still miss the poor thing) my guy came with.

Right upon getting into the salon I said I was here for a fitting and at first she pulled my tall flower girls dress so I said that we needed the bridal gown too. Then she sort of looked funny at my guy and asked "Is that the groom?"

I suppose I could have been snarky and said "No, I can't afford spanx so he's just gonna hold in all my fat." But I just nodded yes, so then she asked incredulously "Can we let him see the dress?"

Rather than wax on about my thoughts on the stupid tradition and how he'd already seen both pictures of the dress and pictures of me in it I just sort of giggled and said it was okay.

At this point my guy was glancing around trying to understand something of the female mind (after seeing the large petticoat he gave in) so I invited him into the dressing room with me. It seemed a lot nicer than leaving him out there in the hordes of women trying to find their dress ready to rip any man apart.

Well long story short the dress fits good, just got to pick it up after it gets pressed (not that it looked wrinkled at all to me). The action picked up more when my tall flower girl arrived.

For any of you that have had to have a dress let out you know where this is going, but for those who are going to but haven't yet when you see your dress it's gonna be in shambles. The dress' little black band around the waist was barely attached and had little black strings hanging off. There was a huge extra flap of exposed seam in the back (which I promptly got stuck in the zipper and then stopped helping).

All in all her dress looked like Frankenstien's monster took a crack at sewing and then Igor took over halfway through.

But the highlight of the day (at least for my guy) was when they had to pin up her bust (it did entertain me when the seamstress asked her to come out so she could stick pins in my friend's bust.) For some reason dressmakers seem to think we're supposed to have DDD's or even F's but a small bust line so she had these little flaps of her dress sticking out on the side.

And what do the seamstress' call them? Boob Wings. Makes perfect sense to women right?

Just try saying that to a male. Go ahead. Boob wings.

Really try it tonight, I'm sure it'll entertain them for at least an hour.

Boob Wings.