Engrish as a second language

I've only googled my own name once or twice, but googling my web username and "introverted wife" I've done more times than I care to count. Usually it's just a way to find what all I've gotten up to but last night I stumbled across the strangest thing I ever imagined.

A blog called Pixar Shorts which copied my own blog post back from June 15th.
At first I only glanced catching a few words here and there. Then the constant use of the word Goliath confused me as I don't remember talking about getting slight shot.

Then I read the opening paragraph and was even more lost as I don't remember getting a serious concussion and then writing a blog post:

There are a defective perks to working in a lab. You can non-specifically light your own hours, lots of tiring ice to be played with, if there’s a employment accompany you won’t be given to upset attached at over getting any rags or go out on the city shirts, oh and all the boxes.

Wow, it's a wonder I have any readers at all if I can't form an even somewhat competent sentence. But then I looked back through my archives and realized that what I really said was this

There are a few perks to working in a lab. You can generally set your own hours, lots of dry ice to be played with, if there's a trade show you won't have to worry about getting any rags or paint shirts, oh and all the boxes.

Then I started getting the giggles as I compared and contrasted what my actual post said compared to the strange temporal distortion of a few babelfish translations.

Normal post:

There's something almost diabolical about putting our dishes in a box with a giant hazardous sticker slapped on the outside. Our books are in a "Dangerous: Flammable" box as well. Probably because of our copy of Fahrenheit 451.

Strange temporal post:

There’s something all but diabolical attached at over putting our dishes in a deal out outwit with a Goliath touch-and-go sticker slapped on the best. Our books are in a “Dangerous: Flammable” deal out outwit as well-spring. Probably because of our spread about of Fahrenheit 451.

I have no idea what it's obsession is with Goliath, but I really want a "touch and go" sticker.

Here are a few of the funniest and biggest head scratchers from the Engrish post I apparently made.

You can in eternity haul someone over the coals when someone in the lab is active to be emotional when all is said. No, in reality. I’m no more than pensive of the lab.

Better be careful about getting to emotional in the lab or you'll get drug across the bbq pit.

We’ve cleaned situated most of our bookshelves and loaded away all our Nautical galley supplies that aren’t on the “use every day” catalogue.

I had no idea I lived on a boat. I wonder what all those nautical galley supplies are for.

I am the trained packer in our bloodline. So I’ve moved settled 10 times in my passion.

Sounds like I should come with an AKC pedigree and my own set of tags.

The however deleterious task attached at over letting on to my penchant means I come to fraternize with most of the millstone of packing all our garbage up.

The army frowns upon fraternizing with millstones and garbage.

We went to a matinee (because we’re loud like that)

Matinees are only for people who randomly scream during movies.

The fleeting ahead the large partition was feverishness and uneven (like all of Pixar’s shorts) attached at over where babies fingers on from and how repay dicey animals be given teensy-weensy babies that desperate straits some inclination too.

Three times my use of "little" was turned into teensy-weensy. Apparently Mr. Bablefish really loves teensy-weensy. For the holiday weekend whenever I am going to type little I'm changing it to teensy-weensy just to appease him.

It’s a spicy relationship of inclination built not on Hollywood record but clubbiness and memories.

Everyone dreams of a spicy relationship that involves memories and clubbing each other.

“Even admitting that I be given no more than met you, I already inclination you.” Sounds like most Golden retrievers I comprehend. The puppies are in reality adorable too (and I’m calm gobsmacked settled the invigoration on the Doberman).

I have no idea what involves the invigoration of a Doberman but if expressing the anal glands is in there count me out.

I hope Mr. Strange Babel translator picks up on a few of my other blog posts because after this week I really needed that hysterical snorting aloud fit of laughter.