Non-matching Bridesmaids

After reading That Bride's post about her own bridesmaids I thought I should share our little approach.

We didn't just throw out the rule book when it came to the bridesmaids attire, we also ran over it with the mower, set it on fire, and dumped it into a volcano for good measure.

I know next to nothing about dresses and shoes and how to make something look just perfect on another body. What I do know is how uncomfortable an unfamiliar dress and pair of shoes can be (not to mention how expensive and just downright evil).

So all I told my best friends and future family was to find a dress in either blue or green and wear it. It didn't matter if you already had it or it was found at a department store clearance sale. Just try to not show up naked (though thanks to some last minute alterations that was a possibility).

However, I would have been perfectly fine with a few barefoot women running around. People didn't even start asking me what shoes they should wear til about a week before and lets face facts it's way too late now, missed the boat, sorry you'll have to pick on your own (and we won't even talk about matching hair and makeup).


I'd say in the end it looks pretty good:


And for a shoe look:

It worked out so much better than I could have imagined, everyone was really happy and relaxed, and no one felt the need to smack me upside the head because my girls weren't in the exact same dress, shoes, and hair.

So take that rules. If one of your best friends wants to wear a dress that isn't made by the same designer as your others or even from the same dreaded dye lot just think about it letting her. Who knows how much fun you could have?

The pretty Maids

So I realized that after 100 and some posts I never really showcased what my bridesmaids will be wearing.

Well, uh, you just sit right there and I'll go and get them.

*slowly backs away and then runs off*

*chirp* *chirp*

Okay so the issue is the I've never actually seen either of them in said dresses and I've only seen my bridesmaid's dress really quick once (she may actually be wearing a different one). It doesn't really bother me but it does make it a lot harder to show off fabulous pictures of them all decked out.

Okay okay, I got a few pictures I can share. No reason to get all upset.

First up here is my Matron of Honor's. She found it at J.C.Penny when it was super on sale so alas it doesn't seem to be available anymore.
Like I said I can't really show off my bridesmaids dress as even I barely remember what it looked like (it may have yellow bells all over it or I might be thinking of that Santa costume I saw last december).

So I'll include my tall flower girl. She got a really gorgeous dress from the bridal salon where I got mine.The actual color of her dress is a minty green. But I do find it entertaining that we were both drawn to dresses that are our favorite colors. I know how much my tall flower girl loves pink and black I would have let her get it that way but she wanted to match everyone.Well that's a vague idea of what our bridal party is gonna look like. Hopefully we'll get some better pictures of people in their dresses for the wedding (if we get pictures of them not in their dresses I promise I won't share them, now give me back my keyboard guys).

Free gifts for all

Okay, if you are in anyway affiliated with me or the wedding party that we are trying to arrange, step back now.

Further.



Further.


Don't make me pull out medusa. She hasn't had much to do lately.


I mean it Stinky and freshman.


Okay, they'll at least feel a little bad now if they're peeking.

First off for my sexy taller flower girl (there is still just something funny about a flower girl that can legally drink).This was my second find from etsy.com.(my first was my necklace) They aren't really earrings meant for the day of wedding (though freshman can pull off anything no matter how weird it is) but she absolutely adores pink and black and these just screamed her as soon as I saw them.

Hopefully she can rock these whenever she gets an opportunity.
So she can be a super cute flower girl I also got her a tiara. I won't be wearing one but I thought it'd be really cool if both of the flower girls had their own tiaras so they can be beautiful. (If you can't tell by now Freshman is my accessories friend, who is also going to be doing my hair for the wedding).

My Matron of Honor and best friend Stinky is a whole nother kettle of fish. She barely wears any jewelry, doesn't do well with random crap (so no flasks or that other stuff everyone always gets a bridesmaid) so I thought outside the box a bit for her.She has a 3 and a half year old son (who is also one of our ring bearers) and all of her pictures of him are online. I remember when I was younger loving to flip through scrapbooks and picture books to find pictures of me when I was a baby.

So I collected a bunch of stickers, some cardstock and a lot of rubber cement to make her a scrapbook of her son.It's just amazing to flip through and watch the little-man grow up. I remember when he was just a few weeks old hearing him sneeze for the first time and realize it was just like his mom's.
For my other bridesmaid (fiance's sister) we've been hunting around for a spanish wine. She's really gotten into wine tasting recently and spent some time in Spain (for school). I don't really want to buy it yet for fear that we could have a big mess on our hands. Let's just say the wedding table is not all that stable.

Like the kids, for the girls I got them each something a bit different from the norm. None of my friends are the same so I never could have pulled off the "tote with cool things in it." But I hope that they'll all enjoy it. If not we can always get them real quick some Thomas bubbles too.

A dress for every season

I have discovered a dichotomy that I cannot make heads or tails of. The trend now is for brides to pick out a dress that their "maids" will wear again, yet if anyone wants to wear said dress that they paid for, had altered to their shape and really like before the wedding they are shot down, rolled up in a carpet, and booted out of town.

First off, I really don't think no matter how hip bridesmaid dresses claim to be that they'll ever really not look like one. Sure it helps that they've moved to tea and cocktail length (sounds like we're all gonna have to pee a lot during this thing) but there is just something about a dress you can only get at a bridal salon that screams wedding party.

My MOH and I looked for some bridesmaid dresses at David's Bridal (by that I mean I sat back and let her go wild, only she knows what looks good on her body so I wasn't gonna offer up any opinions). She managed to find the worst dress ever. It would make anyone above a model sample size look like they're as wide as a truck. We didn't take any pictures of her in it (she'd kill me if I had, it looked so bad I was laughing like crazy) but here's the picture on a slip of a model. In the end all of the dresses there just looked, well, really bad. Nothing looked cute or hip, just sort of dowdy and as though the wearer would rather be swallowed into the bowels of hell.

She lucked out as she found a gorgeous dress at a department store that was in the right color range of blue (I am not a painter, I do not have any swatches for what color everyone should be. I think limiting it to green and blue is enough of a challenge). I would say that if you really do want your girls to wear their dresses again go the department store route. I still feel bad for one who did get her dress at the bridal salon. She says she'd wear it again, and it does look good on her, but I'm still worried about people telling me things to make me happy for fear I'll start breathing fire.

If you are the type of bride who feels like they must stress over every last detail, here's a very thorough article on choosing a bridesmaid dress for all your girls whether they'd like it or not.
I don't get it, this whole matchy matchy thing. The idea that you get final veto for something you aren't paying for or wearing or will have to house in your closet for years to come. I'd much rather they all be comfortable in something they feel sexy in than something I thought would just look perfect on one body type (probably mine) and no one else can pull off.

As for the idea that if they do have a perfect dress that they love the style and color of, but they can't wear it before the wedding I got a few counter arguements. First the idea that you might spill some wine on it (not a major issue as I know neither of my friends drink wine) it's called a dry cleaner, if it rips you happen to know a good seamstress that just altered the dress for you. And as for the bride seeing you in the dress and getting angry I know my MOH is wearing hers for her sisters wedding, I'll be there pulling down guest book duty and I'm excited to see it on her.

Will you marry my wedding?

Really, you're supposed to put a ton of thought, tape, and cardboard stock in order to ask your friends to be a bridesmaid or your Maid/Matron of Honor? Man, no one tells me anything.

All I did was get really excited and the day after we got engaged call up my good friends and ask them. My MOH and flower girl were a no brainer. It'd be impossible to imagine anyone else helping me by making me go dress shopping, getting all excited and finding lots of stuff for me to look through, helping to make the biggest disaster since the Hindenburg, and also willing to just chill and forget about all the wedding crap for a while.

But apparently I really messed up and was supposed to spend a few days trying to think of something really cute and clever and different and alcoholic (okay forget the last one) to ask them.

Here's just a sample of the ideas out there

• About.com's creative ways to ask
• Wedaholic.com (there's that drinking again)
• Foreverwed1.com (which is a really weird name)
• The Knot's take on it all

Some of these ideas seem almost more far fetched and plan intensive than some proposals (and I'm not the only one seeing that). When did it become such a big money maker to just ask your near and dear to stand up for you, wear a dress, sign a piece of paper, and get blind stinking drunk (I think this is the booze post)?

Perusing random wedding stuff catalogs you'll find lots of things you can buy just to give to someone in order to ask them. There's even a cookie. It's no wonder there are so many bridesmaid and brides getting frustrated. How can you say no to a cookie if you really don't want to stand up?

I say there is nothing wrong with just asking someone, maybe buying them one of those ice cream cups you got as a kid if you live in the same town, and then just chatting about how much wedding planning sucks.

Bridesmaid Bootcamp!

I have created a wonderful program to whip your girls into shape and get them ready for the best day of your life!

Welcome to Bridesmaid BootCamp!

The first week is spent getting them into the right mind set. We limit their food to just mind numbing gruel and water. This will bend their minds so that no matter how ugly of a dress you choose for them, they'll gladly pony up $300 and even think that it makes them look gorgeous. (For an extra day we can also convince them that those 4 inch stilettos with the huge bows and rhinestones they have to pay for are a dream come true.)

But you don't just want your girls to stand up there, looking like fashion gone mad with a chainsaw, you also need them to donate weeks of their lives to helping you pull off the "Day to End all Days!"

Every bridesmaid must be efficient at filling out, addressing, and mailing your invitations. For 12 hours we'll set them up in an empty room with just a table, a chair, water, and your pile of invitations that absolutely have to go out in a day. For some extra money we'll also include our etiquette expert Rosco, to make sure that everything is spelled correctly and addressed just so.

For those brides trying to save some money, everyone needs some help with making favors/flowers/centerpieces and we can help there too. Most brides want to be there to make sure their girls are doing everything just right and perfect and we have a perfect solution. With a two-way mirror you can make sure that every ribbon is tied correctly and every flower petal is in the right place thanks to a horrible screech button. Every time a girl messes up just press the button and they will have a screech sound played over the loud speakers until they fix their mistake.

After all this work we know you feel like your girls deserve some thanks (even if we all know you deserved it for being THE BRIDE!) so this program also comes with their own thank you gifts - A coupon book for their city (highlights a $10 oil change), a pen with a flower on it (attached with scotch tape), some earrings just for that big day (will self destruct after 24 hours), and a thank you card that's had your name printed onto it.

Together, Bridesmaid BootCamp and you calling up your girls 12 hours a day we can give you the Perfect Day of Your Life.