Friday, September 19, 2014

The Crow Flies in Midnight

It took a lot of wrenching of garments and gnashing of teeth, but the impossible has finally happened.

Target put its halloween stuff out.

I got my twinkling lights for the last halloween project of the year. I'll explain later.

There's also the griffin statue to protect my yard from any Darkspawn and that adorable crow skeleton.
If I could, I'd skeleton everything. Skeleton cat, skeleton dog, skeleton dragon, skeleton pancakes. Everything must be flayed!

With the kitty from earlier and my horde of skeletons, I decided a little photo set up was in order. So I combined my three skeletons to make this:
If you want a skelekitty or skelecrow, get thee to Target. I predict they will not last long.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Lil Boo

Meet Lil Boo.

He's a bit shy but would really like some candy. 'nk you. Twick or Tweat, please.
Where's his head? Well, you can't be a trick or treater ghost with a head, now can you?

Lil Boo was born when I realized I had a ton of monster mud leftover from Angela. So I got to thinking what could I make that was hobbit sized, partly adorable and partly spooky.

He started out the same as Angela; PVC frame, chicken wire, and a fitted sheet draped over him. I wanted it to look like a kid grabbed an ancient sheet and threw it on before hitting the streets.
To make the gaping hole I tried the balloon approach with mixed results.
I had to do him in a bunch of stages, adding the monster mud first to the body, then slopping on the hood and the balloon.

Finally, I painted the whole grey sheet white and added some accents of brown on the trim to make it look stained and old.
After giving him his bucket and flashlight, he was ready for some candy!

This Sunday, because we didn't have enough to do, we decided to make a coffin. It's not a full one, but about a quarter coffin so it looks like it's bursting from the ground, or poorly buried.
The broken ends at the bottom are courtesy of the asshole who ran into our fence and drove off.

I'm trying some ideas to spook it up, like adding a strobe under or we might get a tiny fog machine to shove under it.
Trick or Treaters and coffins, and I still have one more prop I have to finish before Halloween. It'll be coming down to the wire this year.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Some Halloween Treats

It's the exact middle of September, that hazy golden time when all stores finally scrape away the crusty bits of Back To School but two weeks before Christmas begins its tinsel cacophony.

Halloween Time!

I thought for certain that Target would have it's stuff out this second weekend in September. My hopes lit when I saw a few cute little Halloween things in their $1 cheap shit bins.

But the back walls were nothing but picked over pencils and binders no one seemed in the mood to move. You're dead to me Target.

Yet hope springs eternal in the form of Walgreens. They've been more miss than hit the past few years, but Walgreens is always good for things I don't see anywhere else, and they were no exception this go around. A few adorable dancing things, a crap ton of Nightmare Before Christmas Stuff, and this rat.

I've seen the half rat prop before, usually flailing in a trap or gnawing on something undead. I'm not big into gory so it got a meh. But I fell so badly for the rat chewing away on some potato chips.
It's probably because I watched the hell out of Charlotte's Web as a child, but I had to name the rat Templeton. I wish it sounded like Paul Lynde.

The tombstone got a paint job. I liked the base but it needed some help.
On to the food portion of Halloween.

At Shopko I found these suckers that have bones for sticks! A brilliant idea attached to a rather nasty tasting sucker. Oh well. At least I'll have a ton of bones left over when it's done and I can look like I'm gnawing on a fairy as I suffer through them.

The skull I got from Home Depot. Pretty good deal since it was under $18. But the real point of this picture is those Cheetos. Bone Cheetos! Make your own skeleton Cheetos! Who cares about unicorn tear flavored Lays when we have bone cheetos over here people!
I've been busy updating my Zazzle store with some things, so here comes a vast array of ideas I had.

First up, the open grave car mats.
I had the skeleton grave image from a few years back and Zazzle started offering car mats so I combined the two.

On CafePress I created my first ever rug. It's Stairs to Nowhere for people who wants to have a fake basement.

And finally I fixed up some pictures of Hel and put that on things.

That was the Halloween portion of my weekend that didn't involve power tools. Target's still on the list though. You better have your stuff out this weekend, I need the lights to make something.

Damn you, Target!

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Isn't That Special

Twitter is not easy to explain to the uninitiated, but here's the short short version. People will type things, occasionally things that will get others to retweet it. Because of that I will see in my corner of the world thoughts from other people. Sometimes I reply to those people as well as my friends who retweeted it.

What occurred yesterday was exactly this. I don't have a screencap of the original "joke" but it was basically asking if the Royal Family was allowed to use Birth Control. IE shaming the Duchess and Duke for daring to have two children. Original, I know.

I responded with a Monty Python reference. Specifically the "We have two kids and we've only had sex twice."

First this person retweeted me so I assumed she got the joke:

But then this quickly followed
I searched for the Monty Python clip and sent that as an explanation. I don't expect everyone to get all my references, so I assumed I was being nice and she'd realize her mistake. But rather than admit she was wrong, she failed to get the joke, she doubled down on being a colossal that thing she assumes I have no idea how to use.
At this point I told her off, pointed out how fucking stupid she was for failing to admit it was a joke. Again, her response instead of admitting she was wrong was:
Now, the best fucking part to me is that this genius put a period before my name which means every single one of her measly followers saw that entire exchange. Which means anyone who knew Python or was at least smart enough to think "Hm, maybe that we had sex twice and have two children is a pretty obvious joke," saw just how off the rails she went.

It didn't end there either. She proceeded to call me all kinda of names and demeaned me with a sweetie.

The cheery on top of the shit sundae of all this is that according to her profile she's an inclusive feminist.


Let's see, in the random exchange you had with me you implied asexuals either don't exist or deserve to be cheated on, and you called a grown woman "Sweetie."

Pretty sure that puts her in the company of most MRA spouting Dudebros, actually.

They say in writing "show, don't tell," but that's also true of life. I could claim I'm a fire breathing dragon, but if I don't dribble napalm from my mouth, buffet leathery wings, or horde gold in my vast caverns, I'm just full of shit.

Calling yourself feminist, welcoming of everyone, accepting of everyone, means technicolor crayola crapola when you use and demean others to belittle someone (you don't even know. I have no fucking idea who this person is.)

Life is all show, don't tell.

Oh, and if you obviously missed a joke, admit your damn mistake. It makes you really pathetic when you dig your heels in and refuse to admit you're an idiot.

Monday, September 8, 2014

My new Kitty

There's someone at the back door, scratching to get in. Will you get her?

I call her Skelena Kyle (at least for now) and got her over the weekend. I've had my eye on the cat skeleton since about July (as well as the other prop later in this post) and I was getting one this year, damn it! Spirits was a bit too pricey for my blood, but Shopko had one. I'm still waiting on Target, like every damn year, but they were in theory supposed to have some as well.
Es isn't certain what to make of the usurper.
The other prop I've wanted and scored was this fire and ice spotlight. I have no idea what the ice part is about, but it handles fire beautifully.

Here I placed it in my dog's food bowl and pointed it at the wall.
Then I tried it against Hel and a prop I haven't quite finished or told you about yet. (All in good time, I promise)

There's a rotating yellow inside the red that gives it, while not quite a perfect flame look, a still spooky burning look. I'm thinking I'll use it on my dragon cave/forest behind it this year.

Since we're still not quite done, I also put up my Halloween Town this year. I didn't add anything new, just put the bits in new places and took pictures. Here are a few of the samplings. If you want to see all of the pieces click here.

How long until Halloween?