Friday, June 12, 2015

iZombie: Blaine's World

Here we stand at the brink. Thirteen episodes, the rise of a zombie empire, a cracking of a man's psyche, adorable zombie rats, and -- at the middle of the storm -- is the battle of the undead: Liv vs Blaine. Only one can rise the victor.
Liv        V          Blaine                

Let's get to it!

Still searching for those astronaut brains, Lenny's digging through Major's shit. While Blaine, showing his Lex Luthor skills, figured out that Major's interest in them is his connection to the kids he knew from his job somehow they all miss the Grand Theft Auto arsenal in Major's car.

Not that any of that will help Major (for now), as he finally achieved his season long goal of getting himself fridged. Blaine's preserving Major to torture him for information, but Major's smart enough to know that if he gives away his only card he's dead. After Major refused to divulge his brain storage, Blaine sighs and says: "I love the moxie but I'm the Mick Jagger here. Time is on my side." (Which sadly didn't lead to a duet of them singing "I'm so hot for you, I'm so cold!")

To fill in from the cliffhanger of the last episode, the crew stands around Teresa's bludgeoned body. Our only remaining suspect left a bit of blood on the bed, which somehow means that there's another killer out there and not that Cameron (who Liv already saw threatening Shaggy last episode) is behind it all. Your conclusion jumping makes no sense sometimes, Liv.

Thankfully, aside from some barely noticeable increase in snark there's almost no brain bleed this episode. There's only one zombie vision of a dark hand grabbing another dark thing and doing something with it. I'm glad Liv promptly explains whatever the hell she just saw because most of the zombie vision I'm nodding along "Okay, that was a bunch of what the hell was that?" Apparently, in this quick vision of a hand grabbing onto something green and red colored Teresa got her hands on the flashdrive that had the infamous Max Rager memo. We're back to hunting our Richard Branson like CEO - Von (I have no idea if that's his first or last name. He could be the Madonna of CEOs).

In a twist, we find Von sitting on a couch calmly interviewing his new head scientist who thought he hit the jackpot after leaving his job with Hydra before getting fired upon. They're watching a video of Sebastian sitting in a Max Rager interrogation room (always a great sign when your place of employment has one of those. Benefits include dental, vision, and a golf cart battery + nipple clamps.) While Von tells his new nerd about how Sebastian survived the boat accident and getting run over by a car, Sebastian goes full rage and bashes in the previous lead scientist's skull.

I'm guessing no one thought to run in and stop him because they wanted to get into the snuff film business. Max Rager knows about not only the rage issues (what with it being in their name) but also the zombie side effects as well. Von claims he wants the zombie bits removed while all the good stuff is kept in but I'm wondering if that's true. Sure, you don't want it in the product you ship commercially but the ability to sell undying stooges to all those super villains sounds like a great money maker.

"Tired of your hired hands succumbing to a few arrows in the gut or an eye blast to the face? Give them Super Max and you'll never have to deal with the time and money waste of thug high turnover again."


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