Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Cryptozoological Society for Really Weird Things

*Brrring Brring Brring Click*

Yes, hello. Cryptozoological Society for Really Weird Things I Saw and Tires? I'd like to report a sighting.

No, I don't need any new tires today. Yes, I'm sure. Look, I don't even own a semi. Fine mail me some literature and I'll be sure to toss it into my recycling.

Anyway I'm calling to tell you that I saw one of the creatures. Yes, I saw one myself. Where? Right out in my backyard.

It was a good 4 and a half feet tall, black as night with large glowing eyes and walked on two legs.

Yeah, yeah, no. No antlers.

Well it looked down at me from my deck and I snapped a picture.

No, it didn't try to control my mind using any special powers. Unless an urge to give it a bone counts.

No, there were no prophesies of impending doom that followed its visit. Though there is a rather nasty smelling present in the garden.

Here's the picture. Maybe you can tell me what it is because it won't stop looking at me and dropping a small rubber sphere at my feet.
Ah so it's the rare Canis Erectus. Any idea how to get rid of it?

What do you mean I'm stuck with it? I've already got bigfoot camped out in my tool shed, nessie overflowing my bathtub and mothman hoovering over my kitchen lights. I don't need another one of your wacky creations messing up my house.


Hello! HELLO! I don't know why I keep calling them.