You only get one chance

I really had figured that after my mother had made all the flowers and we'd found all the dresses, we wouldn't have to worry about anyone else throwing in their input on things. Well in comes his side of the family.

These people are party nuts, they will get together and have a party just because it's tuesday. It's quite weird to me where our family would get together maybe once a year and stopped in general after my grandmother died. His aunt loves to plan parties and things. So I really shouldn't have been surprised by all of the ideas of things that I just must simple have because you only get your one chance to have comestibles thrown at you.

First off, aisle runners. I just don't get the point, aside from easy cleanup from all the dirt and stuff the brides shoes leave on the church (I think you should start following her with a vacuum or something it's so bad). You have to pay just to have something plastic rolled over the carpet so, um, you don't touch carpet?

It reminds me of the lava game we played when we were little. Since we don't have that much money as it is to pay for this plastic thing, I guess if we do have to have one we could just cut up a few pieces, lay them down, and then jump from one to the other. Though getting it monogrammed probably wouldn't work out so well then.

Another issue is having rice/confetti/birdseed/soap thrown at us. Sorry, but I don't really see the appeal (and whatever you do, don't give bells to any children). Unless you have a pair of vampires getting married and you have to stall them (though for that you need poppy seeds) who thought that throwing small bits of things at the newlyweds was a good idea? If we really want to appease any grain gods we really should be throwing General Mills cereal or some Cheetos instead.

There have been some other off the wall suggestions (like having a back screen for pictures so we can all pretend we're getting our school pictures again I guess), but so far we're holding our ground and saying no to all the things we just see as throwing our money away.

Hey that's an idea, how about people throw money at us instead. We can even install a stripper pole!