Monday, August 31, 2009

Beef Gizzards are serious buisness

I'm never one to use my status updates to inform the world where I am located or what I am doing at that location (I'm also notorious for using proper capitalization and punctuation because I'm insane like that). You would never find an exchange like say:

"Eating Dinner."

"Cleaning up after Dinner."

"Thinking about using the bathroom."

"In the bathroom."

"Cleaning my hands after going to the bathroom."

"Thinking about eating dinner again."

Repeat ad naseum

I like to stretch my creative muscles just a teensy tiny bit.

Just a few examples, this was when I was clearly in a political puppy mindset:
As a puppy owner I am pro-tummy rub and staunchly anti-pooping in the house. What can your candidate do for me?
Or a horrible lab pun mixed with grown men who like to dress in short shorts.
My band will be called ACIDIC with such hits as "Highway to high pH" and "Those about to titrate we salute you."
I really have no excuses for this one:
Love means never having to say I have a dead hooker in my trunk.
But this morning I fear I may have finally over topped myself (with cherry on top). Wanting to get into an animal scientist slightly meta-ironic mood I posted this little gem about cooking.
The French secret to perfecting any dish is the addition of one special ingredient: Beef Gizzards.
Only I fear a few of my friends didn't quite get the joke. There was a lot of "Wait I don't get it. Only birds have gizzards."A few had to set me straight, thinking I was serious about my French Cooking tip.

And now I'm not sure, do I say that I was just kidding and ruin the joke or do I let them keep thinking I'm a complete dumb ass?

So FYI I guess, if I say something in 140 characters or less take it with a big boulder of salt. More than likely I'm just being my usual smart ass. Maybe I should knit up a little icon like ™ so people could know when I'm kidding.

I know, whenever I say something crazy like "Bigfoot is working at my local Denny's" I'll end it with jk
. Should work just perfect right?

But, seriously, you have to try my beef gizzards. They're just perfect with a nice slice of pasteurized head cheese.


Leslie said...

Some people just don't understand what funny is.

Anonymous said...

Haha. I'm really bad at trying to use proper capitalization and grammar as well (at least on facebook - I don't have twitter.

I'm also hoping that you spelled business wrong on purpose. :P

Linda said...

when I first got on facebook i did the whole running dialogue of my day. Now i post when something pisses me off, something's funny or I want to thank/tease my honey.
i leave the random stuff for twitter.