Ze name es Monsieur Fry, though sadly no relation to either Stephen or Philip J.I was asked by ze purveyor of this site to introduce myself. She and her husband recently inquired about my services as a playmate for small furry friends.
For a small fee I shall devote myself to distracting your puppy from turning her powerful jaws on a beloved box, couch, decorative vase, or your vast supply of tupperware. I cannot wait to spend hours with your soft and cuddly furbaby discussing my amazing life from the year I spent climbing Mount Everest to my one squeaky toy expedition to discover El Dorado.I am sure your puppy and I shall become ze best of friends and last for years and years to come.
What's with all ze snickering? I just know we'll get along swimmingly. What was that? No I don't have any fears of being buried alive or drawn and quartered.
And yes I am rather attached to my squeaky, thank you for asking.
Sadly Mr. Fry could not be reached for comment after this interview as his shoes were ripped off and he was buried up to his neck in mud.
We still have a month or so to go, but we can't wait to have a little puppy tearing everything up attacking little latex toys with wild abandon. They're doing what puppies do best right now: eating, pooping and growing bigger:
Pretty soon those little eyes are gonna start popping open and they won't stagger around like little drunks anymore.
They grow up so fast, don't they?